4 Ways that Dancing Helps Build a Relationship

I used to teach a beginner ballroom for a marriage retreat with my husband, and here are a few things that I noticed about his and my relationship during our dancing, and what I noticed as couples took the time to learn to dance with one another. Whether you are dating, married, or engaged, dancing will strengthen your bond with your partner. Below is a short list of some of the benefits of dancing with your spouse.


When dancing with a partner you form a very special bond. One that doesn’t even require verbal communication to know what the other wants. As dance partners become more in tune with one another their dancing gets better, and there is more pizzazz to their dancing because their dance just CLICKS! You can’t look away from those partners because it is so beautiful how they move as one.

When I got married, I was told that communication is key. Communication makes the marriage better. Communication, communication, communication. And it’s true. My husband and I have found that communication has kept us from getting frustrated with one another to a degree that causes fights, because we can diffuse the situation by talking.

When he started to dance with me, our communication flourished. We began communicating non-verbally. We began to feel more in-sync because we were listening to each other’s movements while we danced, and when we struggled with figuring out a move, we really took the time to talk about it. We were so focused on each other that it just started to carry over in our marital life as well.
I watched as couples were learning to dance. At first they would get frustrated that their partner would step on their foot, or held onto their hand too tight. What did they do? Did they hold it in? Let it fester?! NO! They told their partner, “Hey, this hurts,” and they would talk through the issue, working it out, listening to one another. Building up that skill of communication. It would go from sheer frustration at the beginning of class to taking the time to talk it out before anyone got too frustrated at the end of the class. And that is something everyone needs in a relationship, whether it be dance, marriage, dating, or about to get married.


When two people dance the roles are “lead” and “follow.” The man’s role in a dance is to lead his partner. Direct her, make her look pretty, make sure she doesn’t run into anything or anyone, and trust her that she trusts him. A woman’s role is to follow her partner’s guide and trust him. Trust that he is going to lead her to the music correctly, trust that he is going to catch her in a dip, trust that he isn’t going to run her into anyone, and trust that he is going to tell her what is coming up through their unspoken communication. A partnership that is based on trust is going to be a partnership that succeeds… both in life and dance. When you are in a relationship you need to trust the person you are with. The moment you stop trusting your partner is the moment your relationship will crumble.


Dance is very intimate. Think about the Rhumba, it’s so hot and spicy and close. You get to stand very close to your partner. Arms around one another. Staring into one another’s eyes (depending on the dance). You use that closeness to help you communicate (see #1 on this list).  When I was doing social dance, I had a favorite partner. His name was Thomas. Though we were not exclusively each other’s partner, we could tell when the other was having a rough day just by how the touch changed because we danced so much with one another. We learned each other’s movements. THAT is how powerful touch is in dance!

Remember when you were first dating your partner? How you would find every excuse to touch them? Those shivers you got? Those butterflies in the stomach? Dance is a GREAT excuse for PDA, and you get to touch your partner a lot. Intimacy is a VERY GOOD thing in a romantic relationship.. If you catch my drift.

4.Keeping a Sense of Humor

Making sure to laugh while dancing. This helps keep you from being a difficult partner. When you or your partner trips over your own feet, instead of getting upset or crying, laughing helps ease that situation. If you partner keeps stepping on your toes, or vice versa, instead of yelling, joking about it usually relieves tension and helps let them know you are not mad and opens the door to solving a problem that would have gotten worse if you had gotten mad.  Laughing eases the tension. It’s the same with life: life can be hard, and it is so important to laugh during those hard times.